Monday, February 4, 2008

To Change or Not to Change...That is the Question...That Taunts Me Relentlessly!

There are so many things I want to do, to experience in life. I have always been full of ideas, a visionary extraordinaire, my husband continually marvels at my genius! But it seems these grandois ideas never make it past being verbalized, some merely fantasized (too crazy to admit out loud!).


All of my life I have wanted to do more than average, be more than average, have more than average and give more than average. I avoid average, to be truthful. I used to have a button that stated: "Why be normal?". Normal is average. Boring. I have a red hallway and a red kitchen sink, wallpaper on my ceiling and orange fur around my rearview mirror... I don't do boring.

No offense meant for those of you with plain vanilla walls and all...I am just trying to explain my own complicated self. I want to learn to stretch myself, get out of my comfort zone, push past the obstacles and see some goals reached!

I guess I'll do all that in a little while...


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Is Change Possible?

I am throwing a question out to whoever wants to listen, contemplate and answer...including myself! Is change possible? Yeah, I know we can change our underwear or our haircolor but I am talking deep down kind of personality prodding change!


I think I am going through a mid-life crisis. I see 40 looming on my horizon. Every New Year I get really philosphical and introspective about my life and so I am at that stage where I don't want to watch it all slip past and think of what might have been.




Many years ago I decided that New Years resolutions were just a set up for failure. I also believe that change is possible, people do it all the time, though not in vast numbers. Personally, I don't see how change apart from the help of God Almighty is ever going to happen.




On another post I will talk about some of the changes that I have actually experienced over my life time. Change is inevitable, as they say. Most change, however, happens subtly, in ways that were not predetermined by ourselves..."I want to be more conservative"... that is a little obtuse. Yet, through the years of marriage, family and walking with the Lord, I have gone from two piece swim suits to one piece with shorts, and not just to cover up all those spider veins!




I am interested in exploring the predetermined sort of change. "I want to be a morning person," or, "I am going to stop eating fried food," or, "I am going to be more organized." How many of those types of things have I managed to get ahold of? How many have you?